KEW Hockey Club

The sound of hard ball whacking into the back of a goal is the most pleasing sound to a forward, assuming he’s not in the unfamiliar territory near his own beloved keeper. So, why, do we forwards in the E’s continue to avoid hearing it. We like hitting goals. Not in the same way as an alcoholic likes a beer. But, more in the way one enjoys looking at a fine sunset or a classic Monet, or in fact, Elle Macpherson. It’s NICE, and we do like to do it, but there is so much else to do. And, to be fair, we did hit 3, resulting in the aforementioned thud. But, really, only 3 after a having the ball so much, an opposition who’s only resemblance to athletes was the post games tracksuits they wore,  and you could be mistaken for thinking this scribe is just plain hard to please.

 

Well, as it turns out, I’m not. But, with the back end of  the team shutting down anything resembling a forward  move (or “attack” as you in the hockey industry would have it) with ruthless efficiency, and our stand in keeper, Bricky, rarely troubling his stick with the pain of hitting anything so hard as a ball, your Vets E’s could have rammed home hundreds, nay thousands, with say Jamie Dwyer up front. Now, apart from Jamie’s tender years, which naturally preclude him from joining us in our weekly escapades,I don’t believe we’d want him on the team. I don’t think he’d cope with the speed of our passes, the mesmerizing sophistication of our positional & ball play.

 

I dare to suggest even a young Albert Einstein would have struggled significantly if ever had he been required to plot mathematically the Vets E’s game plan. SO cunning was the first 15 minutes, that the obvious ploy of saying one thing, like playing wide down the right side,  but actually doing the exact opposite, was a masterful strategy. We had them bamboozled. They were thinking (and we could tell this, as they had a semaphore dude working the sidelines), What’s going on here then?

 

But, alas, all strategies frequently require updating to contend with opposition changes. They made none, so we went back to plan A. Go figure! Anyway, we had the ball more than them. We heard 3 thuds, they heard none. And we all ate & drank happily afterwards.

 

PS. We are now 2 Wins & a draw from 3 games. We are quite enjoying not drawing EVERY  BLOODY GAME!